Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Watch the Sky

The reality challenged have always insisted there's some secret army in black helicopters operated by the UN that flies around the country spying on people like them. I have remained a bit skeptical of this.  Our own government has plenty of helicopters and they're used for legitimate transportation needs for the National Guard and Army. And, where I live, military aircraft are rare as there simply aren't any military bases in these parts.

Well, yesterday, I went out to my car.  There was a black helicopter hovering overheard.  Okay, it's probably something with the local college or high school which are both  just a few blocks away. So, I drove off to the grocery store.   I was having trouble finding somewhere to park, so I abruptly turned around and looked up.  There were two black helicopters right above me.  Then I went and had a sandwich.  When I came out of the restaurant there were no helicopters, but I now found myself looking up a lot even though I don't believe I' m really important enough for the government to bother to spy on.   No helicopters. 
I went back to the grocery store.  I wasn't in there long.  When I came back out there were no helicopters. I thought my paranoia was ridiculous.   Then I headed for home.  I pulled over abruptly and got out of my car.  Right above me was a black helicopter.  I was amazed at how quiet it was.  I got back in my car and continued on. I went home and unloaded my groceries. That took all of two minutes. I went back outside and took off in my car.  I dove a few mile then pulled into a gas station. As I got out, I noticed a black helicopter in the sky.  This is weird, I kept thinking.  I went back home and kept looking out my window.  I saw no helicopters. After a half hour of paranoia, I headed out to take some garbage out to the dumpster. There was nothing in the sky.  As I headed back inside, I noticed a helicopter flying by. I went back inside and did not come back out or look outside anymore that day.
One thing about being paranoid is it does make you feel important.

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