Thursday, October 29, 2015

Skeletons Are Up To Something

When I was younger, I was terrified of skeletons.  It all started when I got a skeleton Halloween costume.  It was fine for Halloween trick or treating, but I started having nightmares about skeletons and had to leave the light on when I went to bed.  Although my mother insisted there weren't any skeletons in  the house, I knew better.  I knew they were lurking out in the hall intent on getting me the second I let my guard down.  I eventually outgrew this fixation.  

There is nothing stupider than skeletons in the world of supernatural scariness.  They don't have any muscles.  How the heck do they move?  And what are they actually going to do with you if they catch you? How can they see you? They don't have any eyes.  They don't have ears, either.

Add to that, in all of the books I've edited, no one has ever once submitted a skeleton story to me.  Not ever.  That's because I don't think anyone knows how to really tell a skeleton story.  I remember some of those Sinbad movies and people were getting chased around by skeletons. They should've just turned the lamp on next to the bed. Always worked for me.

Now the one thing I'm really scared of is skunks.  They just totally terrify me.  If the skeletons teamed up with an army of skunks, that would do it.  But just a couple of skeletons? I could take 'em out with a hammer.  Skunks--no way.

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