Friday the 13th

Today is obviously Friday the 13th.  What will happen to me today?  I don't know. I haven't gotten a fortune cookie in a while.  Fortune cookies tell you stuff like that.  "Your car will break down," then you need a new battery.  Or "Some stranger will blow your brains out."  Well, when you get fortune cookies like that you stay home on Friday the 13th. Since I haven't got any fortunes from the cookies, I guess I'll just ride it out