Once upon a time Queen Victoria was in her drawing room hoping no one would come by to bother her. Her luck ran out. "Sir David to see you, your majesty."
"Oh damn," I mean send him in. "How did he get back from America so fast?"
"Your Majesty," sir David said as he bowed. "I have returned from America."
"I can see that, as you are here."
"I was hoping you were making preparations for Ground Hog Day. It does not appear that anything is being made ready," Sir David said.
"About that. Well, we decided to skip Ground Hog Day this year. It's, well it's sort of an American thing," she explained.
"But, does thou not like sausage?"
"Well, British sausage isn't all that good. Ever eat bangers?"
"Ugh. I see your point," he agreed.
"So, go forth, back to America, and, uh, stay over there," she commanded. "Tell them all about your plans for Ground Hog Day. You can send me a post card."
"Yes, your majesty." So Sir David set forth to tell America, once again, about his idea of spicing up Ground Hog Day by serving sausage, as it is made out of ground hog.
Queen Victoria never ate sausage again. And she always seemed to develop a headache in early February for some reason, much to the dismay of her husband, Prince Albert.