Saturday, March 23, 2019

Crazy Old Man

My father turns 92 in a few days.  I asked him what he wanted for his birthday. "Nothing" was his answer. And nothing he shall receive.  I was going to send in to the White House and see if the president would send him a card. Apparently, they do that, but then I realized the president was Donald Trump and nobody wants a card from him, so  I didn't bother.

I thought about getting him a jigsaw puzzle, but doubt he'd like it.  I decided to give him his wish and nothing he shall have.

There are some thing I wish I could get him to do.  A really old guy can get away with stuff I can't.

Sit in his driveway and take pictures of the neighbors all day long.

When my brother goes to work, have the crazy old man sitting in his garage.  That would confuse my brother for days.  Why are you here, dad?  I don't know.

Put my dad's car in my brother's garage. Why is your car in my garage, dad? I don't know.

Have him order a trash dumpster put in his driveway. [My brother has to drive past the crazy old man's house to get  to his house] My brother would ask him why he got the dumpster?  I got a bag of lawn trimmings.

Have him go to my brother's house at dinner time when they weren't expecting him.  Why are you here, dad?  I thought we were having dinner. Never mind and walk away.

Have him go to my brothers house with an 18 year old girl and introduce Misty as his new fiance. "We're getting married tomorrow."      [Oh, how I wish I could get him to do this one. Oh please.]

Well, these actually have more to do with antagonizing my brother. But that's the kind of guy I am.

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